INT. CITI FIELD – SOCIAL MEDIA OFFICE
Chad, the social media intern, sits at his desk, tapping away at his keyboard. Steve enters, a determined look on his face.
STEVE: Chad, got a minute?
CHAD: Of course, Mister Steve. What can I do for you?
STEVE: I need your expertise on something delicate. You know, a tweet for those… uh, less triumphant moments.
CHAD: Ah, the ol’ “we’ll get ’em next time” special. I got you covered, Mister Steve.
Chad cracks his knuckles with a confident grin.
CHAD: I’ll whip up something classy yet reassuring, Mister Steve. You can count on me.
STEVE: Appreciate it, Chad. Let me know when it’s ready.
Steve nods, turning to leave as Chad gets to work, the click-clack of his keyboard filling the room.
INT. STEVE’S OFFICE – CITI FIELD – DAY
Steve sits at his desk, surrounded by paperwork. He sighs, rubbing his temples as he picks up the phone.
STEVE: David, could you come in here for a moment?
David enters, a stack of papers in hand.
DAVID: What’s up, boss?
STEVE: Who is Julio Teheran, and why is Payroll asking me to sign a check for $150,000?
DAVID: Oh, Julio Teheran… he was a pitcher we signed for a brief stint.
STEVE: Brief stint?
DAVID: Yeah, he only lasted 2 and 2/3 innings. Then I cut him
STEVE: You cut him?
DAVID: He wasn’t very good.
STEVE: Then why did you sign him if he’s not very good?
DAVID: I had a hunch.
STEVE: A hunch? For 2 and 2/3 innings? I’m paying a guy $150,000 for 2 and 2/3 innings? I may be rich, but nobody’s that rich. How much is that per out?
Steve leans back in his chair, looking perplexed.
DAVID: Let me do the math… It’s uh, probably quite a lot, Steve.
As David calculates, Chad walks in, looking sheepish.
CHAD: Uh, Mister Steve, I, uh… I sent out the tweet from your account.
STEVE: Well, what does it say?
CHAD: Um, well… It says, “Looks like the Mets forgot how to play baseball again. Maybe they should try a different sport. #Embarrassing #MetsMisery”
Steve winces at the tweet, clearly horrified.
STEVE: Oh no…
DAVID: And uh, regarding Julio Teheran… it comes out to about $56,250 per out.
Steve buries his face in his hands, realizing the financial folly of his decisions.