I went away for a week and came back on Sunday. Having done daily Mets blogging for a while now, including Christmas, it’s really weird for me not to have a handle on this team.

I hadn’t seen or listened to a game in a week. Sure, the hotel left me a USA Today every morning so I could read a small recap. Had my great MLB iphone app (but didn’t have time to use it). I jumped on the internet a few times and read some stories, but I don’t really have the vibe down.

You guys should all be in a panic, no? This team is going nowhere fast, even I can tell that from USA Today. The problem is that I don’t think it’s anyone’s fault.

Bring me the head of……um…..who? Ownership for being cheap? Well Manny Ramirez wouldn’t be playing anyway (although its a nice bat to drop in your lineup on July 3rd). Omar Minaya for picking Ollie over Lowe? Check again in 4 years to see if you still like that Lowe contract. Plus, who out there thought we’d be O for Ollie all the way to July 4th.

Jerry Manuel? Is it really his fault when the lineup consists of names like Cora, Valdez and Santos? (Yeah, you’re the guy that was counting on Santos back in March. Sure.) Some dude name Nieve has been the best starter? I had to learn from Mike Francesca to stop calling the guy Neev.

So what’s going on down there in Philly? You guys have some jerky shock jock trying to get people stirred up that there’s a Phillies jersey buried under Citi Field. Even if there is, who cares? We suck on our own without needing a jinx. What are you going to do, make us blow big leads late in seasons? Make our bullpen spit up 30 games? Oooh I’m so scared. The real question is why aren’t you guys eight games up on us?

I actually had to look up the Cardinals in the standings. I think I can name one Cardinal, and he probably has an interesting workout routine. Keep your head in the sand on that one. Seems the Cards are in first place. Then the Yankees (which would be more fun once a year), then the Brewers (they suck, right? No? Rats.) Then the Phillies, then the Dodgers…holy cow who made this schedule?

We play Washington again on July 20th. I’m looking forward to that one. Maybe Pagan will be back by then.