Open letter to the Oakland A’s and their fans warning them about Matt Harvey

Dear A’s and A’s fans,

I see that you are interested in Matt Harvey and have signed him to a minor league contract.

I get it.  It’s a flier.  He’s inexpensive.  Surely your pitching guru is smarter than that of the Mets, the Reds, and the Angels.  If you can fix him you have pitched up an ace for your stretch run.  Wooooooo.

I get it.

I’ve also probably, almost definitely, watched more Matt Harvey innings the last two years than anyone.  Here’s the thing – you can’t trust him with an inning.

This is how it’s going to go.  He will look OK.  There will be articles with The Narrative that while he’s no longer the Dark Knight if he can just do what he did tonight blah blah blah.  Been there, done that in New York, in Cincy in Anaheim.

You may even get one of those five inning two run starts that is OK.  But it’s not real.

My man gives up A LOT of deep fly balls…and sometimes those balls go over the fence.

The Dark Knight seemingly CANNOT PITCH OUT OF TROUBLE.   He will look OK in the clean innings but the second even one man gets to first base I am telling you GET YOUR BULLPEN THE BLEEP UP RIGHT NOW.    That one runner will lead to a four-spot.

I tried to warn the Angels but they would not listen and they gave him 11 million dollars.

This is your future Oakland, only in green…

Look at that A’s fans!!!!  Do you think your scout has all these screen grabs of Matt Harvey watching balls fly out of the park?  He does not.  I am telling you, I have watched him pitch and you cannot trust him with a baseball game now matter how OK he looked in whatever non-game showcase your scout watched.  Don’y you guys empty some dude named Sandy?  He should know better than anyone.

Believe me, I love me some Matt Harvey.  Nothing gets me more clicks than Matt Harvey News.  I hope he brings the Full Namath and bangs all your Oakland Supermodels, drives all your sports cars, hangs out at Warriors games and eats all your burritos. (look it up)

I look forward to recapping his adventures.