INT. JERRY’S APARTMENT – DAY
STEVE: (proudly) I’ve got it! The Queen’s Crew – an all-new hip-hop hype team for the 2024 season! They’ll be at the forefront of fan engagement with freestyle and choreographed performances!
ELAINE: What idiot came up with that idea?
STEVE: I did.
JERRY: (skeptically) Hip-hop at a baseball game? What’s next, breakdancing umpires?
ELAINE: (doubtful) Steve, I’m not sure hip-hop and baseball mix. It’s like serving caviar at a hot dog stand.
JERRY: or being a hundred million dollars over the luxury tax but hiring a rookie manager.
KRAMER: (enthusiastically) I think it’s brilliant, Steve! It’s revolutionary! The fans will love it!
As they’re discussing, there is a knock at the door. Jerry answers.
NEWMAN; Hello Jerry.
JERRY: Hello Newman.
NEWMAN: Did I hear that right? A hip-hop team for the Mets? I’m in!
STEVE: (taken aback) You? I don’t think you’re quite the right fit for it, Newman. We’re looking to appeal to….a more…..fitter…. type of fan.
NEWMAN: (indignant) Not the right fit? I’ll have you know I was the lead dancer in my high school musical!
JERRY: (teasingly) What was it, Newman? “Phantom of the Opera Meets a Buffet”?
STEVE: (firmly) It’s not about high school moves, Newman. It’s about modern, energetic hip-hop.
JERRY: (teasingly) Yeah, Newman, I think Steve is looking for more ‘Queen’s Crew,’ less ‘Queen’s Zoo.’
NEWMAN: (angrily) This is discrimination! I demand an audition!
STEVE: (frustrated) This isn’t a charity, Newman. It’s serious entertainment.
KRAMER: Well, can I audition?
INT. CITI FIELD – OWNER’S BOX – SUMMER DAY
The scene opens to a sunny day at Citi Field. The stadium is buzzing with anticipation. Steve and Jerry are in the owner’s box, overlooking the field where “The Queens Crew” is about to perform.
STEVE: (nervously) Here it goes, Jerry. The debut of The Queens Crew. This is going to revolutionize game day entertainment.
JERRY: (skeptically) Or it’ll be a great way to clear the stadium.
The music starts, and The Queens Crew begins their performance. It quickly becomes apparent that things are not going as planned. The synchronization is off, the moves are not quite hitting, and the crowd is more confused than entertained.
KRAMER, who is part of The Queens Crew, is wildly off-beat, doing his own interpretive dance moves, completely out of sync with the rest.
JERRY: (dryly) Look at Kramer, he’s like a giraffe on roller skates.
STEVE: (cringing) This is not how they rehearsed it! What are they doing?
Suddenly, one of the dancers misses a step, causing a domino effect, resulting in a clumsy pile-up. The crowd reacts with a mix of gasps and muffled laughter.
STEVE: (burying his face in his hands) This is a disaster.
JERRY: (quipping) The roster you put together? Oh, you mean the dancing.
The camera pans over the crowd, capturing their bewildered reactions, some chuckling, others just shaking their heads in disbelief.
STEVE: (mortified) I think we might have just set the record for the fastest fan entertainment failure in baseball history.
JERRY: I think you already did that when you didn’t call Ohtani.
