The Soto Meeting

INT. JERRY’S APARTMENT – DAY

[Steve bursts in, looking excited]

Steve: (triumphantly) Great news! Just had an amazing meeting with Soto. He’s gonna be a Met!

Jerry: (skeptical) Really? Then why is he meeting with the Phillies right now?

Steve: (defensive) Jerry, Jerry, Jerry… you gotta understand how these things work. Agents have to do their due diligence.

Jerry: Like when you didn’t even call Ohtani’s guy last year?

Steve: (getting agitated) Ohtani didn’t want to play in New York, OK? He made that very clear!

Jerry: But Soto does. Just not for the Yankees?

Steve: (defensive) That’s different!

Jerry: (sarcastically) Oh right, because he’d rather play for the team whose identity is the Grimace instead of the team he just took to the World Series.

[Kramer bursts through the door]

Kramer:  What are you guys talking about?

Jerry: Oh, Steve here thinks Soto is signing with the Mets.

Kramer: (excited) Why wouldn’t he?  The Mets have signed lots of great free agents over the years… You got Jason Bay, Bobby Bonilla, George Foster,, Mo Vaughn….

Steve: (interrupting) Kramer, please…

Kramer: (continuing, more animated)  Luis Castillo, Vince Coleman

Steve: (getting more upset) Those were the Wilpons!!!

Jerry: (smirking) Yeah and they didn’t call Ohtani’s agent either.

Kramer: (really getting into it now) Eddie Murray, Kaz Matsui…..

Steve: (covering his ears) ENOUGH! This time it’s different! Soto wants to be here!

Jerry: (deadpan) Sure he does, Steve. Just like Jose Reyes wanted to be here before waiting seven minutes to sign with Miami.

[Steve slumps onto the couch, defeated]

Steve: (muttering) At least we still have the Grimace…

The Mets Police
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