What Mets fans talk about when not talking about the actual games.
There was a time when I would have been excited by this, but the last decade has really ruined baseball. And with most things Mets, the Wilpons waited too long. Uncle Steve doesn’t have a time machine, so this is all he can do but still the time for caring is long gone now.
FLUSHING, N.Y., January 15, 2024 – The New York Mets today announced that the club has signed 20 international players.
“We are excited to welcome this year’s international signing class to our organization,” said Mets President of Baseball Operations David Stearns. “These players and their families have worked hard to get to this day, and we look forward to supporting them as they continue pursuing their dreams to be Major League players. As we carry out our goal of creating a championship caliber organization, we will need to continue to acquire and develop future Mets. Having an international scouting and development apparatus that regularly brings quality players into our organization is essential.”
“Today is a great day for the New York Mets as we welcome an exciting class of talented players into the organization,” said Director of International Scouting Steve Barningham. “This is the beginning of a journey for these players as they take their first steps in professional baseball. I want to thank our entire baseball operations team as well as the families of these young men for their help along the way.”
The class is highlighted by Yovanny Rodriguez, a 17-year-old catcher from Guarenas, Venezuela. The 5-11, 180-pounder is ranked as the fifth-best international prospect according to Baseball America and as the seventh-best prospect on MLB Pipeline’s Top 50 Internationals Prospect List.
STEVE: (boasting) Jerry, guess who the Mets just signed? Vlad Guerrero. And get this—he called ME!
JERRY: (raising an eyebrow) Vlad Guerrero Jr.? That’s a big catch. What did you have to give up for him?
STEVE: (confused) Give up? Jerry, when you’re this good, players come to you. That’s the Uncle Steve charm!
JERRY: Well, you are pretty charming, but I’m sure the Blue Jays didn’t give you Guerrero for nothing.
STEVE: why do you keep bringing up Toronto?
At that moment, Kramer slides in, overhearing the conversation.
JERRY: (to Kramer) Kramer, tell him about Vlad Guerrero Jr. and the Blue Jays.
KRAMER: (casually) Oh yeah, Vlad Jr.’s a Blue Jay. But there’s this other guy, Vladimir Miguel Guerrero.
STEVE: (slowly) Vladimir Miguel Guerrero?
KRAMER: (nodding) Vladimir Miguel Guerrero.
JERRY: (puzzled) Not Vladimir Guerrero Jr.?
STEVE: (dawning horror) Not Vladimir Guerrero Jr.?
KRAMER: (clarifying) No, not Junior. Vladimir Miguel Guerrero.
Steve’s face drops as realization dawns upon him.
STEVE: (stunned) Wait, there’s another one?
STEVE: (facepalming) I thought I was getting Vladimir Guerrero Jr.
JERRY: (mockingly) So, you got Vladimir Miguel Guerrero instead of Vladimir Guerrero Jr.?
STEVE: (exasperated) Yes, Jerry! Vladimir Miguel Guerrero, not Vladimir Guerrero Jr.!
JERRY: Well, why did you sign Vladimir Miguel Guerrero?
STEVE: Jerry, he called ME. He said “Hi, this is Vlad Guerrero. I said THE Vlad Guerrero, son of the Hall of Famer? He said yes Jerry. He said YES!”
JERRY: Did you check with David?
STEVE (dismissively): Jerry, I don’t check with David. Kramer, are you sure this isn’t Vladimir Guerrero Jr.?
KRAMER: (nodding) Yep, Vlad Miguel is a prospect. Good player, but not the big-league superstar… yet.
STEVE: what do you mean, yet?
KRAMER: well, he’s only 17, He needs some seasoning.
JERRY: Look at this way, you’ll have a new player in 2029.
STEVE: (panicking) You mean to tell me… I didn’t sign Vlad Guerrero Jr.?
JERRY: (slyly) Looks like you might have signed the “junior” member of the Guerrero family without knowing it.
CITI FIELD – DAY
A banner hangs in the background announcing the newest Met, and a crowd of reporters buzzes with anticipation. Steve stands at the podium, his face betraying a tinge of embarrassment.
STEVE: (clearing his throat) Ladies and gentlemen, thank you for joining us today. We are thrilled to introduce a new addition to the Mets family.
He gestures to his side, where a young, enthusiastic player stands, beaming.
STEVE: (hesitantly) Please give a warm welcome to… Vladimir Miguel Guerrero.
The crowd murmurs in confusion, some reporters whispering amongst themselves, trying to reconcile the name with their expectations.
ADAM THE REPORTER : (calling out) Steve, is this the same Guerrero from the Blue Jays?
STEVE: (forcing a smile) Ah, well, no. This is Vladimir Miguel Guerrero, an exciting prospect with a big future ahead.
ADAM (perplexed) So, not Vladimir Guerrero Jr., the All-Star?
STEVE: (awkwardly) No, not Junior., but let’s not dwell on names. It‘s talent that truly makes a player. And we believe Vladimir Miguel here has talent in spades.
The young Guerrero steps forward, waving modestly, a stark contrast to the star power of his namesake.
STEVE: Any more questions? Yes, you in the back?
JERRY: Any plans to sign Shohei Miguel Ohtani?
Business Insider looked atSteve Cohen’s investing tips.
“I’m focused on my losers. Am I missing something? Is there something changing?” Cohen said. “If I feel like something is changing or I feel like I don’t know why, I will reduce.”
“Weekends are a really good time to think about things because your mind’s a little more free,” he continued. “Analyze why it’s happening and be thoughtful about it as opposed to just attributing it to, ‘Oh I’m not working hard enough, I’ll work an extra two hours.'” (via Business Insider)
So it’s good to know Steve is focused on his losers, say for example, the New York Mets, a loser baseball club in 2023. But has Steve decide to “reduce” his investment? It seems like that may be the case given the underwhelming off-season. Maybe Steve also realizes baseball is changing in the era of the dying RSNs. Who knows.
You can tell how much he wants to be here.
Oops.
He’s so used to saying Yankees Organization pic.twitter.com/XWrK7GszVB
— Mario G (@marioagomez_1) January 10, 2024
