The Mets Police

Dear Snowflakes,

Calm down.

Your last place Mets are only two games out of the third wild card.  You know the third wild card, the thing that sometimes Steve Cohen Era Mets teams “win.”

Remember the gimmick team from 2024?  I see you guys reminiscing about them. Remember how they SUCKED and then got hot and then made the third wild card on the final day of the season and then were about to get knocked out when suddenly Pete Alonso got jammed and the ball went to the one part of the park where it would go out?  Manager Carlos Mendoza and the gang?  Remember them?

People who are freaking out today are soft.  I saw someone namecheck Vince Coleman.  Please.  Unless you stared in to the abyss on June 16, 1977 and the four and a half years that followed until April 5, 1983 (IYKYK and if you don’t you wouldn’t understand anyway) then you have no idea what HARD is.

Meanwhile, the Mets are calling up…checks notes….Tommy Pham.  Boy I wish the Wilpons were around to call up Tommy Pham.

The billionaire is the Wilpons with better PR.  Nothing has been accomplished.  We are in Year 6 of the Year 5 plan.  He shows up on twitter when things are good and hides out when they aren’t.  He feeds the media so they say once things (same with Lindor).  He retires numbers and then more numbers and then more numbers.  You worship him and grant him parkland.  Another year goes by without a ring.

I would not be surprised if Steve completes Project Casino Redevelopment and then dumps the baseball team.  Forbes has the Mets valued at $3,500,000,000.  Steve bought the team for $2,420,000,000 or so.  That would be a nice billion dollar profit.  It’s not one point eight billion dollars, but it’s not nothing.

Meanwhile, you’re booing Lindor again just like you did when he first got here.  As soon as he goes three for five you’ll be cheering him even though he did something unacceptable to the customers.  You’re soft and would cheer Jefferey Epstein if struck ten guys out.

And you spent a decade calling ME negative, and you’re upset about being two back of the Third Wild Card on April 13th?

You’re stressed about a few rough days?  Grow a pair of cleats and man up.  Some days you wake up and trading Dave Kingman was only the second most shocking thing that happened.  Sometimes you get shut out by the Sacramento Athletics.

It’s baseball.  They will probably sweep the Dodgers.  LGM.

 

Uncle Steve gave you free tickets and you didn’t even use them.

It appears that the Casino Mogul jumped on twitter for the first time in a while, to comment on the free ticket situation.

I’m kinda with Steve here.  This was a nice thing for the Mets to do – both moving the game, and offering tickets – and people went and did this.

I’m not sure what motivated Steve to jump on or not – usually we only hear from him during winning streaks and never during losing streaks – but it appears to me you have made him sad.

 

Steve this is getting insane now.

My guess is the Mets know this season is a bust and want the nice late season attendance bump.

We’ve gone from not enough to way too many. I couldn’t even remember if 5 had been retired yet or not and had to look it up (it has).

Ok, that’s it.  There isn’t another number to be retired for at least 30 more years,  Cut it out.  Stop.

Also, the Mets used to send stuff out.  I checked with fellow bloggers and they don’t do that anymore.  Oh well.

I have actually watched three baseball games so far, more than I have in a few years (baseball is boring.)

Some things caught my ears:

Did you hear Keith tell the story yesterday about aiming his glove for Hojo to make the throw?  Keith told the exact same story Saturday.  Did Keith forget?

Did you hear Gary Cohen mention his cataract surgery?  Have you noticed me for the past few years mentioning Gary wasn’t seeing the ball well on calls?

Also have you noticed the extreme degree to which Keith and Ron do not want to do this Youth Sports Coach For A Day thing SNY is pushing?