The Mets Police

Yesterday I told you of my dream of a 67 year old chain-smoking old school manager.

Today, it’s @ceetar’s dream, the artificial intelligence.

The M-5 (M for Mets, and 5 in honor of Davey Jonson who first brought computers to the Mets’ manager office) has all the data and can run simulations for every pitch in the blink of an eye.  Every single detail of the game is dialed down to the math. No more hunches, no more feel.  The computer is pure logic, optimized for every situation.

This is what the people in charge of baseball want…so let’s go all in and get rid of the human.   A decent AI can probably simulate an answer to a Gelbs question anyway.

Unfortunately, the marketing department is not ready to sell “Come see our computer out manage the humans!” just yet.  Give it another few years.

Will the M-5 manage the Mets? No.

For the full series of Will This Guy Manage The Mets click here.

Here’s what I want in the next manager of the Mets…

I want the Generic Baseball Manager from movies.   He’s 67 and has a mustache.  He chain-smokes.  He has no time for “how did it feel when…” questions from Gelbs.

Generic Baseball Movie Manager plays the same guys 6 days a week and sometimes gives a guy a spot start on Sunday.

He lets his starting pitchers pitch until their arms fall off…regularly going 8 or 9 innings.

He’s got one guy in the bullpen he trusts and he uses him.

Will Generic Movie Baseball Manager manage the Mets?  Unfortunately no.

To see the full series of Will This Guy Manage The Mets click here.

Again part of this series is to mock columns and random names, like this one from the Sporting News who float Mike Venable.

Maybe a surprise name and a long shot, but Venable is in his first season as a bench coach with the Red Sox. Before that, however, the 38-year old spent four seasons with the Cubs, including two as first base coach and the 2020 season as third base coach.

A nine-year MLB veteran, Venable is also close with longtime front office executive and master rebuilder of teams Theo Epstein, who has recently been connected to openings in the Mets’ front office.

Hey if Theo says he’s the guy then I am in.  But if Theo isn’t here, a 38 year old untried manager?  How many times are we going to make that mistake.  Pete Alonso needs a disciplinarian not an older brother.

Will Mike Venable manage the Mets?  No.

You can find the full series of “will this guy manage the Mets? No” here.

 

I don’t know if you know this, but Todd Frazier is from New Jersey, played in the  Little League World Series, and even met Derek Jeter once.

He will also do whatever it takes to win a baseball game, even if it means tricking umpires!

That said, he has never managed.  He needs some seasoning down in Toms River before we hand him the bug job and bring Salt & Pepper back to Queens.

Will Todd Frazier manage the Mets?  No.

You can find the full series of “will this guy manage the Mets? No” here.

 

I have been saying that the Mets won’t go with an untried manager.

As Terry might say, “Four years of not managing may have made me a little stale, but I wouldn’t consider myself untried.”

Will they give the Mets back to Terry?

No.

Steve can’t afford to go backward….but a 72 year old guy who has managed before is kind of exactly what I want for the next Mets manager.  If Terry Collins weren’t Terry Collins he’d be perfect!

Will Terry Collins manage the Mets (again)?  No.

You can find the full series of “will this guy manage the Mets? No” here.